Jump to content

User talk:JamesMLane/SBVT intro

Page contents not supported in other languages.
From Wikipedia, the free encyclopedia
< User talk:JamesMLane
This is an old revision of this page, as edited by JamesMLane (talk | contribs) at 06:59, 7 September 2004 (moving comments to talk). The present address (URL) is a permanent link to this revision, which may differ significantly from the current revision.

I like the substance fine. As to style, I'd rather avoid the use of parentheses in the first paragraph. But substance is more important, and it seems fine to me. Wolfman 06:22, 7 Sep 2004 (UTC)

Note from JML: "Version 2" is the one that incorporates the edit signed:Nysus 06:28, 7 Sep 2004 (UTC)

Aside from cleaning up the language, I did the following:

  • Added a sentence in there about the impact the group had on the campaign. Imagine if it's the year 2020 and someone is looking at this article. It's very important to talk about the real impact these guys had on the election.
  • Added the fact that the ads appeared in hotly contested states. This shows that a prime motivation of the group was to cost Kerry the election. I think that's a very important point, too. --Nysus 06:31, 7 Sep 2004 (UTC)
Retrieved from "https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?title=User_talk:JamesMLane/SBVT_intro&oldid=5722491"